So, the majority of the texts that I get are asking how I am doing. Most of my close friends and family will ask, how are you doing, really? Not “how do feel and please say good because I don’t want to know if it’s not good, but really, how are you doing?” I know that is very wordy but that’s the only way I can put it into words.
The answer to that question changes minute by minute. I described how I feel to one of my friends like this. It’s like a rollercoaster. One minute I am doing good and am encouraged that we have done the right thing and the next minute I am feeling really sorry for myself and regretting making this crazy move. It is not one day at a time. It is one minute at a time.
If things are going my way then I am happy. Then, if for example, the guy is coming to install our TV’s and the one in the main family room just quits working, then I am a mess!!! Yes, it is all really stupid stuff that I get worked up about but I was really looking forward to us all sitting down and watching a movie together. It really is very selfish. But it’s real. Or, when we got cable installed (We havent had cable since we got married so I have been really excited) and ALL but about 3 channels are in Spanish! Well, Duh!!! I am learning to “manage my expectations” which is an old saying that Nathan brought into my life when we were dating. We use it a lot.
I have to give myself a break sometimes and realize that we have only been here for a short time and it takes a while to adjust. It is not realistic to think that I should already speak Spanish fluently or know my way around or have lots of friends and a daily cleaning and workout routine.
But on the other hand, I need to put on my big girl pants and set a good example for my children when things don’t go my way!!!
The picture below is just one of the ways we had to manage our expectations. Instead of cuddling up on he couch to watch a movie we decided to cuddle up in my bed and have a Despicable Me marathon with pizza! Not ideal, but it was a lot of fun and a great memory.